Recently I had the opportunity to spend some time in South Africa on safari with a good friend. Like many trips, it started with anticipation months before we ever got on an airplane. There was excitement about the adventure, the people we would see, and the experiences we hoped to have.
But as the trip got closer, things started to change.
About a week before we were scheduled to leave, I got a call from Dave, the safari operator. The permit we were hoping to receive, the one that had been a significant part of why I booked this particular trip, still hadn't been approved. There was a chance it would come through, but there was no guarantee.
Almost immediately, my outlook began to shift.
I started asking myself questions. If the permit doesn't come through, should I even go? Is this trip still worth taking? Am I going to be disappointed the entire time?
As I thought about it more, I realized something that wasn't particularly comfortable for me to admit.
The trip had become all about me.
It had become focused on whether I was going to get exactly what I wanted, exactly how I wanted it, and exactly when I wanted it. While I think that's a normal reaction, and probably one that many people would have, I also realized it was an extraordinarily selfish way to look at the situation.
The reality was that this trip wasn'tjust about me.
I had a good friend traveling with me. There were staff members in camp preparing for our arrival. Friends from Zimbabwe were planning to meet us. There were people who had invested their time, energy, and effort into making the experience successful. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that even if things didn't go according to plan, there was still tremendous value in showing up.
So, Imade a decision.
I was going regardless of whether the permit arrived.
As it turned out, the uncertainty followed us all the way into the trip. Five days into a ten-day safari, the permit was finally approved. Everything worked out. We were able to accomplish what we had hoped to accomplish.
But the lesson wasn't found in the permit.
The lesson was found in the days leading up to it.
One of the things I've been working on over the last several years is managing the emotional highs and lows that come with life, business, family, and even recreation. Early in my career, my peaks were incredibly high, and my valleys were incredibly low. Good news could make my day. Bad news could ruin my week.
Over time, I've realized that living life on that emotional roller coaster is exhausting.
The older I get, the more I believe successisn't about eliminating challenges. It's about narrowing the gap between the peaks and the valleys.
When unexpected news arrives, it's easy to let your mind race toward the worst-case scenario. It's easy to walk yourself deeper and deeper into disappointment before anything has actually happened. On the flip side, when things finally work out, it's easy to become so emotionally invested in the outcome that reality can never quite live up to the expectations you've created.
What I've learned is that reasonable expectations create room for gratitude.
Instead of attaching all our happiness to a single outcome, we can appreciate the experience itself.
That's what happened in South Africa.
Yes, the permit eventually arrived. Yes, the safari was successful. But when I reflect on the trip, those aren't the first things that come to mind.
I remember the conversations.
I remember the friendships.
I remember sitting around camp with people from different backgrounds, different countries, and different life experiences.
I remember being reminded once again that the world is a much bigger place than the small corner of it that I occupy every day.
Travel has a unique way of doing that.
It forces perspective.
When you spend time with people who live differently than you do, work differently than you do, and face challenges you may never experience, you begin to appreciate what you have. You become more aware of how fortunate you are. You realize that life isn't always about getting your way.
In many respects, happiness is a choice.
It's not necessarily what happens to us. It's how we choose to respond.
Over the course of those two weeks, there were several situations that could have become negative experiences. Instead, because of the attitudes of the people involved, they became positive ones. Friendships were strengthened. Memories were created. Lessons were learned.
Looking back, I'm incredibly thankful.
Thankful for a friend willing to jump on an airplane and share an adventure.
Thankful for a family that supports those opportunities.
Thankful for a team at the office that works hard every day, so our clients and our business continue moving forward while we're away.
Most importantly, I'm thankful for the reminder.
The permit mattered. The safari mattered. The experience mattered.
But what mattered most was remembering that life is often bigger than the thing we're chasing.
Success, failure, disappointment, achievement, travel, business, family, and friendship all have a way of teaching us lessons if we're willing to pay attention.
This trip reminded me that some of the best lessons come when things don't exactly go according to plan.
And maybe that's the point.
The goal isn't to avoid uncertainty, challenges, or setbacks. The goal is to become the type of person who can navigate them with perspective, gratitude, and a balanced outlook.
Because at the end of the day, the experiences that shape us most are rarely about what we accomplish.
They're about who we become along the way.