The other day I was scrolling through my feed and stopped to read what was a simple but thought-provoking statement, for me anyway. It was a painted sign on the side of a building that read:
"Make a Habit of Reaching Out to People Just Because They've Crossed Your Mind."
The message made me pause. Quite honestly, it’s something I’ve done for as long as I can remember. It’s never been a calculated effort—just something that's always felt natural to me.
In my line of work, as in many others, relationships are everything. Sure, we have expertise, the years of experience, and the know-how, but at the heart of what we do, is relationships and trust. It’s easy to get caught up in the technical aspects—suitability, construction, design, expense—especially when you’re sitting through yet another sales training or product presentation, but whenever someone offers me advice on how to improve my business, or when I’m consulting on theirs, I always circle back to this core principle: relationships first. It’s the bedrock on which everything else stands.
So, what does this have to do with making a habit of reaching out to people just because they crossed your mind? In my opinion, it's central to who we are, both as individuals and as professionals. Building relationships that aren’t rooted in profit, or any ulterior motive is what truly fosters trust over time. There’s something incredibly powerful in sending a simple text, shooting off a quick email, or making a phone call just to check in—no strings attached. It’s about genuinely caring how someone is doing, what’s happening in their world, and being truly interested in their response.
The concept of an "emotional bank account," popularized by Stephen Covey in his 1989 book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People," applies to all areas of life, not just sales. Covey uses this metaphor to illustrate how trust and relationships are built through small, positive interactions—deposits—such as reaching out to someone just because they crossed your mind. These thoughtful connections gradually build a reserve of goodwill, trust, and mutual respect, creating bonds that are more meaningful and long-lasting. Conversely, negative interactions act as withdrawals, potentially damaging the relationship. By consistently making these emotional deposits, you sustain and deepen relationships, whether in business or in life, ensuring they can withstand more challenging times.
At our core, we all have a fundamental need to feel safe, wanted, and loved. And what better way to fulfill that need than to receive a message out of the blue, just because you crossed someone’s mind? There’s no hidden agenda, no expectation—just a pure, unfiltered connection. It’s a small gesture, but it speaks volumes.
In a world that often feels increasingly transactional, these moments of genuine connection stand out. They remind us that, at the end of the day, what really matters isn’t the deal you closed or the project you finished. It’s the relationships you’ve nurtured along the way, the trust you’ve earned, and the people you’ve touched simply by reaching out and saying, “you were on my mind today.”
So, the next time someone crosses your mind, take a moment to connect. Send that text, make that call, or write that email. It’s a small habit that, when practiced regularly, can lead to relationships that are stronger, more meaningful, and ultimately, more fulfilling. And isn’t that what life—and business—is really all about?
Mark J Modzeleski, CFS, CLTC, AIF
President, Legacy Wealth Advisors of NY